Half of coupled-up Americans admit that their current partner is the worst sex they’ve ever had.
That’s the takeaway from a recent study examining the biggest embarrassments and disasters in the intimate lives of 2,000 sexually active U.S. residents.
One in five people has had more than 10 really bad sexual encounters in their lives, which is almost three times the average of seven.
Two-fifths of five (44%), however, have stopped mid-sex because it was so painful.
Survey conducted by OnePoll for LELO. It also found that 69% of respondents find good and bad sex equally memorable.
Respondents also reminisced about some of their funniest and most regrettable moments in bed, such as calling out an ex’s name in the heat of the moment, or falling off the couch and rupturing four vertebral discs.
One tried to have sex on the cemetery’s parking lot. “Let’s just say my partner thought he saw a ghost,” they confessed. “For me, it was hilarious.”
For those who’ve injured themselves during sex, 57% said it happened in the shower, while 53% said it was caused by a position known as the “wheelbarrow.”
But the easiest way to injure yourself having sex is actually “doggy-style,” according to 62% of respondents.
Non-dangerous sex snafus: A third of people (37%), have stopped midway through an intercourse to have to pee while a third (33%), have fallen asleep with their partner.
“No matter how serious you are, there is something about awkward sex stories or injuries that makes people laugh. Doggy-style injuries, stopping mid-way because you had to pee, that moment when you regretted your exhibitionism – all of these are a part of every person’s sex life. These stories will be shared in a non-judgemental, humorous way to make everyone’s lives more enjoyable. Life isn’t a movie – sex between real people is always awkward to some degree, and no one can escape it, so it’s completely unreasonable to be ashamed of it.” said Sara Kranjcec Jukic, LELO’s Global Brand Manager.
And embarrassment doesn’t just happen in the bedroom; 64% of respondents felt embarrassed by publicly displaying affection.
Topping the list of PDA moves that people think are “too much” — makeout sessions in the park (35%), use of the dreaded “baby voice” (35%) and even something as simple as putting a hand over a partner’s shoulder (35%)
By comparison, slightly fewer people (29%) said that touching a partner’s behind was unbearable to witness, suggesting a correlation between how long the affection lasts and how awkward it is to observe.
While 63% of respondents dislike excessive PDA, many others have admitted to doing it while in a romantic relationship.
“Let’s be honest, if you’re with the right person, there’s nothing that can happen during sex that you won’t be able to laugh off, possibly even store for later to use as a funny anecdote. Good sex is when both parties listen to and pay attention to each other, and when they don’t take themselves so seriously. Just relax and enjoy yourselves!” Additional Sara Kranjcec Jukic.
5 MOST DANGEROUS SIDE WAYS TO GET SEX
- “Doggy-style” 62%
- Shower 57%
- The “wheelbarrow” 53%
- The “ballet dancer” 51%
- the “reverse cowgirl” 46%
TOP 10 MOST UNCOMFORTABLE PDA FORMS
- Kissing your partner in the park 35%
- Talking to a partner using a baby voice 35%
- Don’t put your hand on the shoulders of your partner 35%
- Holding a partner’s hand 34%
- Touching a partner’s behind 29%
- Sitting in a partner’s lap around friends 28%
- A pet name can be used to call a partner a partner 27%
- Proposing marriage at a public location 26%
- Give your partner a kiss on the lips 16%
- Staring at your partner 12%
Donna is a Volonté contributor and freelancer who lives in San Francisco with her understanding husband and not-so-understanding teenage sons. Her work has been published by The Journal of Sexology. She is currently writing a book about love language.