According to new research, a third of Americans lie to their significant others about the number of their sexual partners.
A study of 2,000 Americans who’ve had sex revealed that of those who’ve fibbed their number (32%), 42% were men and 23% were women.
Now that we know that a whopping third of us are telling this white lie, let’s dig into why. 21% kept the truth secret because they thought that their partner would be able to judge their real number. While 17% did not. percent thought their partner’s number was too different from their real one so they chose a fake number closer to their partner’s.
It’s no wonder that so many are hiding their “number” since it came out as one of the most uncomfortable topics to discuss with a significant other. The survey was commissioned by LELO OnePoll also found that sexual preferences (33%) and past sexual experiences (45%), were two other difficult topics to discuss.
Of those respondents currently in a relationship (75%), two in five have not shared their “number” with their partner. When asked why they’ve held their number back, almost half (48%) confessed they’d be worried about their partner’s reaction to it.
Results found 61% of men were losing sleep over their partner’s possible reaction to their number, while only 40% of women felt the same. However, 58% of those in a relationship chose to share their number with their partner.
How quickly did they reveal these details? One third of respondents revealed their details within six months, while 40% shared it within three months. A quarter of those who shared their number with their partner did so because they had already told theirs. 22% of respondents admitted that they tell their S.O. One in five people said they told their S.O. everything, while 22% admitted to it.
It’s a real leap of faith to share something so personal with a partner since 60% think there is a stigma that makes them hesitant to discuss their sexual preferences and kinks. In spite of that, 75% think there’s still a negative stigma lingering around women’s sexuality and sexual freedom.
Sara Kranjčec Jukić, Brand Manager for LELO, said, “The fact that 60% of the respondents are hesitant to share their kinks with their partner isn’t as surprising as we’d like to think. Unfortunately, society’s general attitude towards sex and pleasure skews our perception of what we can and cannot share with our partners. While there is a negative stigma surrounding kink, it’s mostly due to the lack of public discourse about it. Talking more about sexual preferences, and human sexuality generally, would make it much easier for people to accept themselves and then share their thoughts with each other. Sharing something like this with a partner can only deepen the intimacy of the relationship.”
These data show that Americans are gradually becoming more open to their sexuality. A majority of respondents (73%) feel that conversations about homosexuality have improved in the last five years.
Respondents ranked the top topics that they believe are most important for a conversation with their partner. 59% voted for sexual preferences. Second place was consent with 53%. Forty-one percent want to open up about what their partner can do better in bed but only 34% want to hear constructive feedback about their own skills in the sack.
Sara Kranjčec Jukić, added, “Open communication is the only effective way to achieve a healthy and fulfilling sexual and romantic relationship, everything else is just a temporary fix. It’s important to remember that your partner is not a mind reader and unless you voice your needs, some of them will remain unfulfilled to both partners’ dissatisfaction. The most important thing, however, is to be open to yourself and to accept your partner. With 59% of the respondents putting sexual preferences as an important topic to speak to their partners about, I’d say we’re on the right track. It would have been so much easier to get there sooner. LELO spends time educating everyone who listens. Our sexual well-being is an important part of our lives and it shouldn’t be disregarded because it’s a “touchy” subject.”
Top topics to discuss with partners
- Number of partners in sexual relationships 45%
- Experiments with sexuality in the past 45%
- Sexual preferences 33%
- Kinks 32%
- They can do more in bed 27%
Top topics to discuss with partners
- Sexual preferences 59%
- Consent 53%
- They can do more in bed 41%
- Kinks 35%
- What I can do to make my bed more comfortable 34%
- Number of partners 31%
- Previous sexual preferences 30%